Monday, December 24, 2012

A Christmas Carol

One of my favorite parts about Christmas are the carols. I don't even put up a tree - but the carols start three weeks early and don't stop until my husband attacks all the radios at midnight on the 26th. (Not everyone digs carols as much as I do!)

I often think I like holiday music so much because it's the one thing my mother couldn't ruin with her drinking at Christmas.  Bing Crosby is always Bing Crosby, right? Doesn't matter who's yelling, fighting or sleeping off a bender.

Speaking of my mom, I haven't told her about this blog yet. I may have mentioned my cleanses in passing, but I'm reluctant to bring the plan up because I'm sure she'll see the ghosts of her own Christmases past in my words.

Not that she drinks a lot anymore. Still, it's been years since I've been home for Christmas. (Wahhh!) Maybe because the last time I went, we both got very drunk and said some things that shouldn't have been said and did some things that shouldn't have been done and I ended up projectile vomiting in the downstairs bathroom half the night. Then in the morning, as usual, she seemed to have no memory of anything. Sigh. It wasn't the first time Christmas turned into a drunk nightmare ... but it was the last.

That's not to say my relationship with my mom isn't better. It's great! I had a lovely chat with her and my brother yesterday and got all my prezzies shipped off in time to get under the tree. It's a sort of compromised Christmas but it works for us right now. And I am so grateful - so unbelievably grateful - that my mother senses something about the situation and never guilts me out about not making the trip. Never. She's unbelievably forgiving. She has to be, I guess ... We've both learned a lot about forgiveness over the years.

Saving Christmas is actually one of the reasons I started blogging publicly about my plan. Because I often wondered how many parents out there - especially single ones, like my mom - were out of control of their drinking and couldn't help but let the extra pressures (and pleasures!) of Christmas turn into a drunken ordeal for their kids. I thought if I could help just one person understand what was happening to them and how to turn it around ... well, that would be a Christmas miracle for me ... ;)

Incidentally, between all the shopping and the schlepping and the socializing, the hubs and I had a chance to watch Jimmy Carrey in "A Christmas Carol" last night. Or at least the ghosts of Christmas past and present. We'll save the future for another night. But wow, what a flick. It is a trippy, ecstatic, truly spectacular Christmas experience - all in animation that will blow your mind. And if you have to be sober this Christmas ... that might just be what you need.

I personally think the trailer doesn't do it justice - it comes off as so dark and narrow. The actual movie is much bigger and brighter. And what's Scrooge without the happy ending? But here it is anyway!

Merry Christmas to all! And to all a good (insert Christmas wish here)!