Friday, August 12, 2011

I'm fine, thanks.

Last night, the hubs and I went to a patio for dinner and drinks. There were six of us altogether, sitting outside on a midsummer night as the sun started to go down. We had a wonderful time, with much laughter and storytelling.

The wine was served in 8 oz carafes with a big empty glass; I like that. It's always fun to top up your wine glass - it's very elegant and it feels as if you're getting more.

I had two carafes of the Faccioli Pinot Grigio 2009. When I was getting down to the end of the second, I noticed everyone else was finishing up their second drinks, too. It was still pretty early and the waitress came over to ask if we wanted another round. We were staying for a while, but most everyone was driving, so nobody ordered another.

I don't drive - so naturally, I didn't have to worry about that. And it was clear from the mood of the gang and how much water and/or booze everyone had to finish that we were still going to be there for a while to finish up. I wasn't drunk so I know the hubs wouldn't have had a problem if I wanted to have another drink. Especially since my next cleanse is coming up in less than two weeks.

But you know what? I didn't order one.

That in itself is a pretty big milestone, considering in the old days I would've pounded back at least one more carafe, if not two. But more importantly is this:

I didn't CARE if I had another one.

I honestly didn't care one way or another. After the waitress left with my empty wine glass, I didn't feel resentful or bitter or anxious. I wasn't sitting there fidgeting and bored, waiting to leave so I could drink more at home. Which is exactly the way life was before I started cleansing.

To me (other than the fabulous company) that was the great gift of the night. Not only did I not drink too much - but I didn't care when I wasn't drinking at all. To anyone with a drinking problem, you know what a relief that would be. Being able to take or leave another drink without ruining your mood. But that's the freedom and control that cleansing can give you. And I am so grateful for that on this wonderful sunny Friday morning.

Plus I don't have a hangover. :)

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